Random Notes

David Talbot's "Creepier Than Nixon" offers an interesting interview with John Dean, author of Worse than Watergate: The Secret Presidency of George W. Bush.

"Bush and Cheney have exploited terrorism ever since 9/11. Now they are exploiting it to get reelected. Should there be an even more serious threat, they have found that when Americans are frightened they can be governed like sheep, which suits Bush and Cheney perfectly. Rather than taking the terror out of terrorism by educating and informing Americans, they have sought to make terrorism as frightening as possible -- using terrorism to launch a war of aggression that is breeding a new generation of terrorists and getting the Congress to pass the most repressive new laws imaginable and calling it an act of patriotism." -- John Dean

As we discussed last night, the President is prepared, subject to the conditions set forth below, to agree to the request of the National Commission on Terrorist Attacks Upon the United States for public testimony, under oath, by the Assistant to the President for National Security Affairs, Dr. Condoleezza Rice.



...



The necessary conditions are as follows. First, the Commission must agree in writing that Dr. [Condoleezza] Rice's testimony before die Commission does not set any precedent for future Commission requests, or requests in any other context, for testimony by a National Security Advisor or any other White House official.

So, let me see if I have this straight. They're going to let her testify as long as they all agree it's not setting a precedent. Does anyone in the Bush adminstration understand the term "precedent"? Somewhere down the road a judge can say "Well, they let Condi do it," no matter what Bush and the Commission scribbled down in their notes.



I also love the way the Bush folks keep using the phrase "unprecedented and extraordinary access," as if repeating it over and over again will help people ignore their being one of the most insular and secretive administrations in decades.

I stumbled across the Electronic Text Center at the University of Virginia while I was surfing around last night. They have 1,800 public-domain texts formatted for Microsoft Reader.



I went on a downloading spree: Pride and Prejudice, Sense and Sensibility, The Marvelous Land of Oz, Wuthering Heights, Heart of Darkness, The Red Badge of Courage, Hound of the Baskervilles, Livius' The History of Rome, The Communist Manifesto, Dracula, Moby Dick, and a bunch of others... and that was by surfing through 250 of the available titles. I'll be checking out that entire list over the next few weeks, I think.

Nintendo is bringing its "Famicom Mini" set of Game Boy Advance games to the U.S. as the Classic NES Series. Each cartridge is an emulated version of an old Nintendo classic, proving once again that you can keep squeezing money out of these old games if they're good enough.



At least five of them were unlockable in Animal Crossing on the Gamecube, but the only one I'm interested in buying is The Legend of Zelda. I love that game, and they've done a wonderful job of squeezing it down to the GBA's screen dimensions.



So, let's see... I still have my original NES cartridge, a version unlocked on Animal Crossing, a version as part of the Legend of Zelda Collector's Edition Gamecube disc (with Zelda 2, Ocarina of Time and Majora's Mask), a Pocket NES version emulated on my Game Boy Advance ROM flash cart, and a copy on my PDA. I should be shot for even thinking of spending $20 for a Game Boy Advance cartridge. But I'm gonna do it anyway.

From an Associated Press article...

"Had I known that the enemy was going to use airplanes to strike America, to attack us, I would have used every resource, every asset, every power of this government to protect the American people," the president said.

If one of my buddies is talking about his ex-wife and threatens to "teach that bitch a lesson" before driving off with murderous rage and a skin full of alcohol, I might reasonably assume he's going to do something awful. If I didn't do anything, do you think I could duck responsibility by saying "Hey, if I'd known he was going to shoot her three times in the face at 2 a.m., I would've called the police" and get away with it?



The Bush administration has been very careful these past few days, fighting Richard Clarke's assertion they ignored terrorism and the threat presented by al-Qaida. I'm sure Bush would've defended America if he'd known terrorists were going to use a plane or a bomb or gas or anthrax or even a briefcase nuke. That's a "Well, D'uh!" kind of answer, but it doesn't address whether he was even paying attention to the terrorists.



I'm particularly enjoying watching Condoleezza refusing to testify under oath before the Sept. 11th commission. She's eager to offer some sort of rebuttal to Clarke's testimoy, and I hope they tell her "Thanks, but no thanks" unless she's under oath as well. Otherwise, it wouldn't be fair. This Constitutional principal she's using to justify her refusal to go under oath is a smokescreen because precedent is against her. She can't be forced, but she could do it if the Bush team wanted her to.

From an Ain't It Cool News review of The Passion of the Christ and Dawn of the Dead. This cracked me up, and it's as charmingly insensitive as my wanting to yell "H it him again! I don't feel forgiven yet!"

"I'll make the Jesus review quick -- it fucking rules. It made me yell, "Jesus Christ on a cross!" even the scenes that didn't have Jesus Christ on a cross. This one's directed by Mel Gibson and he obviously lea rned some shit from LETHAL WEAPON 2 because he gets right to the action. There's a shot of the moon and then right away there's gladiator dudes beating the crap out of a bunch of hippies. Jesus is this guy with a super-powered left hand -- it's like he ca n give people Wolverine powers by touching them with his left hand. He makes a guy's ear grow back but before you know it the gladiator dudes arrest him and beat the be-jeezus out of Jesus for two straight hours. Then they nail him to a cross, and he dies, but not after bleeding enough blood to fill up everyone in CADDYSHACK plus that fat vampire dude in the first BLADE movie. Everyone's pissed at Jesus. They all want him dead. But this is back in Bible times, when they didn't have shotguns and chainsaws, and back then when you want to kill a superhero you have to rain two hours of whomp-ass on him and then nail him to something, sort of like a message to other superheroes. And they must have gotten the message, because there weren't any more superheroes until Superman."

Kristofer and I have been playing a text-based online game called Nation States. You choose a name for your country, answer a few questions to work out the country's political structure, and you're good to go.



Ea ch day, a new political issue comes before your government. My nation, The Holy Replublic of Pardes, had to decide today about uranium found in a rain forest. Do I go in and bulldoze everything to get it, restrict mining to preserve as much of the environment as possible, or keep it off limits to protect the rain forest? Do I ignore the problem altogether? The choices you make will introduce subtle changes into your country's infrastructure.



It's really sort of a political choose-your-own-adventure game. There's no set goal, although there are forums for discussion and a Nation States version of the United Nations.



Players can develop regions so their friends can play in the same area. Kristofer and I have our countries in a region he created called Tattooine. His country is a very liberal civil rights paradise, while I'm playing as a despotic, iron-fisted theocracy along the lines of The Republic of Gilead in Margaret Atwood's The Handmaid's Tale. Naturally, our respective nations are constantly poised on the brink of war. There are no actual wars in the game, but players in the same region may leave messages for each other; we do a lot of saber rattling.



So, here's an open call if anyone out there is interested: go to Nation States, create a country, and then move to the region of Tattooine. My country needs room to expand, so I need other nations in the area so I can pretend to want to invade them..

I'm wondering what's on the agenda for tonight's PFLAG Parkersburg meeting. I'm sure the constant changes in the gay marriage situation will be discussed.



If you're in the Parkersburg area, why not stop in? They meet at 7p.m. at the Red Cross building on Market Street.

As if West Virginian's didn't have to work hard enough to erase the image of being inbred hicks, Abercrombie & Fitch is selling a shirt with the slogan "It's all relative in West Virginia. Naturally Gov. Wise is pissed.



I think we're missing out on something. Instead of focusing on the "I'm sleeping with my cousin" aspect of the phrase, why not argue that it's nice of them to recognize our work in physics?



It's a clever shirt, although I don't know why anyone is surprised. This is the company that thought Asian stereotypes like "Two Wongs Can Make it White" were the height of wit. Ancient Chinese secret, huh?

Dawn of the Dead was a neat little horror movie, about what you'd expect these days. Lots of zombies, lots of gore, and not an original idea in its head for the most part. The original is much better, but this one is still pretty good. I'll buy the DVD when it hits.

I just finished watching George Romero's classic Dawn of the Dead to gear up to see the remake in a few hours. I love those crazy flesh-devouring undead, and I have to wonder if I'll get a chance to use the headline "Zombies devour Christ at box office" on Monday.



Probably not a good idea.

I forgot about this being St. Patrick's Day, mostly because I stopped marking the day a long time ago. It seemed like a great deal as a kid because you had license to run up and pinch people if they weren't wearing green (which seemed unfair to the color blind). The closest I'll get is to share this gaelic blessing my friend Greg used to keep on his wall:



May those who love us, love us

And those that don't love us

may God turn their hearts;

and if He don't turn their hearts

may He turn their ankles

so we'll know them by their limping.

Who says reading the Bible has to be boring? Check out The Brick Testament for the Kubrick version of everyone's favorite stories. I think Mel Gibson should work in this medium for his next outing.



In other news, I saw About a Boy this afternoon. Can Hugh Grant get any yummier? I didn't think it was possible until I saw him in this movie. He still catches hell for cheating on Hurley with a hooker, but I remember the words of Bill Maher (or was it Chris Rock?): "Show me a beautiful woman, and I'll show you a man who's tired of fucking her."

I got a call from my mother, asking me to phone my three-year-old niece because she wanted to talk to me.



When April handed her the phone, Laura said "I miss you, Uncle Bubba."



I felt a little ferklempt when she said that.



"Are you coming to my pool party, Uncle Bubba? You'd better."



"When is it?" I asked, even though I know when her birthday is.



She asked April when it was and told me "In May. You better be there."



"Honey, I'll be there a few times before then."



It turns out Laura saw my picture on the shelf and told April she wished I was there instead of just my picture. She almost never speaks to me on the phone, so it was nice to hear her voice.



In other news, I received my weekly news roundup from The Advocate. It turns out Paul Winfield, the actor who died earlier in the week, was gay and had been mourning the death of his longtime companion for the past year or so.

It seems godless Americans have their own group. I found the story linked from Pat Buchanan's latest column and had to smile.

"Now, atheists, freethinkers, secular humanists and other nonbelievers have another alternative in giving voice to our concerns, and letting candidates for public office know that they must now start recognizing us as a potential force in American politics." -- Godless Amercians Political Action Committee executive director Ellen Johnson

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Think God is gunning for gays? Check out God Hates Shrimp and organize a protest of Long John Silvers today!



In other news, I was almost thrilled by an audiobook discovery. While surfing the catalog at Audible, trying to pick this month's selections, I found Chuck Palahniuk reading Choke. I almost got it, until I saw the word "abridged" on it. Terry don't do abridged novels, baby. He got his fill of Readers Digest Condensed (just add water!) back in the old days.



I'll eventually buy it, though. I'd like to hear the author read his own work, and I can at least pretend he approved the abridgement. But it's at the bottom of my list -- right after I finish buying the Discworld series.

James Carroll discusses "The Risks of Waging 'Culture War'" as it relates to the Bush push for an amendment banning gay marriage.

The phrase "culture war" comes from "Kulturkampf." That word was coined in the 1870s when Germany's George W. Bush, Otto von Bismarck, launched a "values" campaign as a way of shoring up his political power. Distracting from issues of war and economic stress, the "Kulturkampf" ran from 1871 to about 1887. Bismarck's strategy was to unite his base by inciting hatred of those who were not part of it.

I was looking over my shelf Sunday and saw my copy of Dan Simmons' Carrion Comfort. It's one of the best modern horror novels I've ever read. I remember reading an interview with Harlan Ellison where he mentioned the book and how great it was; the interviewer had never heard of it, and Ellison said that wasn't a big surprise.



I wanted to read it but could never find it. One of my friends at Glenville, Heather Eberly, let me borrow hers and ended up giving it to me when I enjoyed it so much. Books are good gifts, and I've always been grateful for this one.



The best part is that I haven't read it in five or six years and can't remember how it went. It's all fresh and new again. Thanks, Heather.

Actor Paul Winfield died Sunday. That sucks, because I always liked him whenever he was on the screen. He worked all over the map, but I mostly know him from genre appearances like Star Trek and Babylon 5. Nobody took a self-inflicted post-parastic-infection phaser blast like Winfield. Cheers.

It turns out one of my favorite celebrities, Margaret Cho, has her own blog. I love Cho because she's a lot like my sister: bold, brassy, and full of advice for anyone who ever thought it was a god-given duty to offer blowjobs to support the troops. God bless America. Learn to swallow or the terrorists win.

GameSpot has a pretty decent article, "When Two Tribes Go to War: A History of Video Game Controversy", detailing the twists and turns of my favorite hobby. They even have a photo of Sen. Joseph Lieberman, whom I've distrusted ever since he and his cronies described the Sega-CD game Night Trap as "an effort to trap and kill women" even though the goal was to save them.



Speaking of disturbing games, I've started playing Silent Hill 3 again in an effort to unlock the flamethrower. For this second run-through, I'm playing on Easy and using a machine gun with unlimited ammunition... but it's not helping me a bit. I'm still getting freaked out and have to stop after thirty or forty minutes.



In other news, Lesbians seek marriage license from W.Va. Supreme Court.

There's a Simpsons episode where Homer and family are swallowed by a giant carnivorous plant. After a few seconds of struggle, Homer pushes his way out. Bart, awestruck, asks "How did you do that?" and Homer says "It's a plant."



That's sort of how I felt, flipping the channels and seeing something called Marabunta on The Sci Fi Channel. It's a movie about ants going on a rampage in Alaska, and I was amazed at the lengths to which the characters were going to fight them. The guy with a flamethrower had a good idea. The lady pumping shotgun rounds into a teeny-tiny column of ants should've put the barrel in her mouth and saved us the two hours' of craptacular non-spectacle.



Admittedly, I only watched about ten minutes of the entire thing. I'm not sure, but I think the family was driving like mad in their truck and then had to worry because the ants caught up a few minutes later. That only works when the writers are lazy or the little fuckers are hitching a lift on a cheetah.



Sci Fi should change its name to WHEN ANIMALS ATTACK! because that seems to be the only kind of movies they show anymore. If it weren't for Tripping the Rift and the Battlestar Galactica remake they're doing, I'd write that station off.

Well, I spent Tuesday and Wednesday sick in bed and Thursday wishing I was, so here's hoping Friday is going to be much better.