Why I'm Not In Charge of Rainbows and Unicorns
News that Baltimore's mysterious "Poe Toaster" went missing this year gave me a small sense of elation. This is one of those idiotic tourist trap "mysteries" that manages to piss me off every single year when it flies into my radar.
It's not a "mystery." It's just lazy reporting directed by editors who would rather preserve some stupid tradition instead of getting at the truth. The only mystery is why someone didn't just walk up to the guy and ask "What's your story?" instead of offering the same hushed-tone campfire story every single year.
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